Ford Family Fun

Last week was a wonderful treat for me, as the Halverson family came up to New York to celebrate Christmas. Anna and Ryan piled a minivan full of kids and holiday cheer and then drove North. Among our many festive events were a few memorable culinary experiences....

My favorite NYC Christmas event is the Bronx Botanical Garden Holiday Train Show. A miniature version of NYC is constructed out of plant products, and model trains snake around the Statue of Liberty, the George Washington Bridge, and many other historical buildings. As you can imagine, this was quite a hit with Anna's kids.

Ollie and I hide out in the gingerbread house in the Children's Garden.

After working up our appetites by marveling at the trains and playing in the Children's Garden, we drove to Arthur Avenue, "the real Little Italy", to fill our bellies. We went to Dominick's, where we were greated by a boisterous crowd of early-dining Italian-Americans. The waiter did not present us menus, he just asked, "Whaddaya feel like eating?" We told him to surprise us, and happily stuffed ourselves with pillowy bread, silky pasta and chicken parmesan which had been pounded flat and fried crisp. We had joked at the sheer amount of food placed before us, but were pretty much all liking the plates by the end of the meal. After dinner, we got an assortment of pastries and coffee from the shop next door and headed back into Manhattan, already missing our dinner.

The Halversons explored the city for a few more days, and on Christmas Eve, we all headed up to our dad's house in Unadilla, NY. Dad had been spiffing the place up in anticipation of Christmas for months, and it looked great! Immediately, the Halversons, our parents, and my boyfriend Adam who joined the fray settled into the activities that Unadilla does best. (i.e. sitting around relaxing and eating).

Gathered around the tree, where we all watched the boys open presents.

I'm pretty sure that the adults enjoyed the boys' presents as much as they did. Again, all this relaxing got our appetites going! Adam and I decided to get to work to make Christmas dinner.

Our menu included:

-sauteed mushrooms

-smashed red potatoes with roasted garlic

-artichokes with rouille dipping sauce

-pork loin

-ice cream and cookies for dessert

The cooking was pretty much standard, but as the pork loin is Dad's sure-fire recipe, I will share it with you:

-make 1-inch stab wounds in a large slab of pork, about 1-2 inches apart

-tuck a clove of garlic into each pocket

-sprinkle rosemary and thyme, and salt and pepper the entire piece of meat

-roll the pork into a cinnamon-bun shape, and tie it with string

-brown the meat on all sides in a sautee pan

-stick it in the oven to complete cooking at 350 degrees

-after about 30-45 minutes, it should be done (use a meat thermometer to ensure >150 degrees)

-slice and serve

English Crackers have long been a tradition at our Christmas Feast. Even little Elliot is a king!

We all sat down to a delicious meal and realized how truly lucky we are to be able to be together as a family.

Asleep at the Wheel

We got some really bad news at the pediatrician's office on Tuesday. Oliver, who has been in weekly "feeding therapy" at Duke for the past 4 months has actually lost an astounding 2 pounds over the course of the past 6 weeks. He went from 27 pounds 10 oz. back down to 25 pounds 11 oz.

This news has brought on waves of incredible stress, guilt, worry, anger, frustration, more guilt, and more stress. I really thought that things were moving forward with his eating. We didn't have dinnertime battles anymore, but now I see that was mostly because he wasn't eating and we weren't pushing it. I guess simply the fact that he was in therapy made us (me) relax and stop being vigilant about how many calories he was actually ingesting. Basically, I fell asleep at the wheel and Oliver is paying the price for my negligence. I feel horrible. I feel like nothing good that I am doing in terms of parenting: teaching him to be kind to his brother, to share, to be polite, to make good decisions, to be confident and happy, or time spent encouraging him, reading to him, or singing with him or providing positive discipline is worth ANYTHING if I can't keep him from starving himself. I am beyond distraught. I felt like we were really doing well. I felt like we have such a great relationship and he is such a fantastic kid and I felt really proud of the job that I was doing but I was failing at the most basic, fundamental keeping-your-kid-alive aspect.

What was different in the past 6 weeks:
-stopped using the "behavioral approach" which was positively reinforcing every bite he took with some form of a reward (a puzzle piece, a sticker, a few minutes of watching Cars)
-started a "sensory-integration approach" with the assumption that he needed first to be comfortable seeing, then smelling, then touching, then touching the food to his lips, before he would be comfortable enough to actually put something in his mouth and chew it up and swallow it.
-discontinued Periactin, the appetite stimulant that I didn't really think was working (apparently I was wrong)
-stopped letting Ollie go to bed with a sippy cup of Pediasure

What we have to do moving forward:
-make sure that he gets enough Pediasure?
-start him back on periactin
-?????

I am fresh out of ideas. I honestly don't know what to do. He doesn't eat food. Correction, he doesn't eat enough food to support his growth. Here is the problem:
-Oliver doesn't have a strong appetite, he is profoundly uninterested in food
-Oliver hasn't yet developed the skills needed to eat effectively (chewing and swallowing)
-Oliver is really picky about what food he will even CONSIDER putting in his mouth (ie there are certain foods he can't stand to even have on his plate)
-Oliver is probably genetically a small kid to start with, so he wouldn't be a huge guy even if he DID eat.

The only thing I can think is that we are going to start back up with behavioral approach, which is so painful for me (and I think Oliver, too) because it takes everything he enjoys and turns it into a tool for manipulation and turns everything into a negotiation over food. Oh, you like playing with trains??? well you can't play with trains until you eat these bites. You like reading Cat in the Hat? OK, well you can read that book when you eat this whole cracker. The ground that we are fighting over is pathetically small. It's not like "oh, when you eat your broccoli you get to play with cars," it's "when you eat this tiny bite of brownie/cookie/muffin/pancake." Stuff that I wish we weren't letting him eat in the first place we have to bribe/manipulate him into eating. It is NO FUN. NONE. NONE AT ALL. I find myself getting so frustrated and angry when he doesn't cooperate.

I really don't know what else to do. I had a long discussion today with his pediatrician and he suggested that Ryan and I meet with the feeding therapists (an occupational therapist and a speech language pathologist who focuses on feeding issues) to discuss a concrete plan of action. He said that if we weren't comfortable with their plan or our questions/concerns weren't addressed we should look at UNC or another feeding program. He also mentioned that there are inpatient feeding programs at the Children's Hospital in Richmond and at Johns Hopkins. That would be a really awful "solution" I think for someone as tender and sensitive as Oliver. It makes me so sad to even consider sending him away to stay in a hospital. It makes me feel like we are totally failing at our jobs as parents. Like foster parents or the state should take over. I remember thinking this before, when he was really little (13-17 months) and he wasn't gaining weight at all. I had this fear that I would bring him in for a weight check appointment and the doctor or social worker or someone would take one look at his skinny little body and decide that they would have to take him away from us because we weren't able to make him "thrive." It makes me so sad to remember that period, and so discouraged to think that what I had really thought was behind us is still very much with us. ARGH!!! The pediatrician also in the nicest way possible suggested that WE (me and/or Ryan) might want to seek counseling, too. I wanted to laugh, but maybe he's right. I honestly don't think it's any of our "issues" that are at the root of Oliver's problem, but boy, Oliver's not eating is certainly creating a whole boatload of new "issues" that I could talk about in therapy.

Anyway, I thought this post was sufficiently angst-y enough to put on this blog rather than our family blog. And this definitely qualifies as something that is keeping me up at night.

Thanksgiving Recipes

So I totally forgot to take pictures of any of the gorgeous and yummy Thanksgiving dishes or the pre-Thanksgiving meal Abby and I made while she was down here for a few days before Thanksgiving. Whoops. Anyway, there were some real winners so I wanted to post the recipes and you can take my word for it that they looked great, too.

I adapted Alton Brown's recipe that you can find here. This technique is awesome because the turkey comes out tasting great and it cooks in much less time (2-2 1/2 hours) than most other recipes. I am a big proponent of brining. This year I wanted to do an apple cider brine. Abby and I tried this with a chicken the week before Thanksgiving. In both cases I'm not sure I could taste apple cider, per se, but I sure could taste "delicious". Here is my recipe.

1 (14 to 16 pound) fresh young turkey
For the brine:
1 cup kosher salt
1/2 cup light brown sugar
1 gallon apple cider
1 tablespoon black peppercorns
1 1/2 teaspoons allspice berries
3 bay leaves
1 gallon cold water

For the aromatics:
1 red apple, sliced
1/2 onion, sliced
1 cinnamon stick
1 cup water
4 sprigs rosemary

Early on the day or the night before you'd like to eat:
Combine the cider, salt, brown sugar, peppercorns, allspice berries, and bay leaves in a stockpot over medium-high heat. Stir occasionally to dissolve solids and bring to a boil. Then remove the brine from the heat and cool by adding lots of ice cubes.
Combine the brine, water and ice in the 5-gallon bucket. Place the thawed turkey breast side down in brine. If necessary, weigh down the bird to ensure it is fully immersed, cover, and refrigerate or set in cool area for 8 to 16 hours, turning the bird once half way through brining.

Preheat the oven to 500 degrees F. Remove the bird from brine and rinse inside and out with cold water. Discard the brine.

Place the bird on roasting rack inside a half sheet pan and pat dry with paper towels.
Combine the apple, onion, cinnamon stick, and 1 cup of water in a microwave safe dish and microwave on high for 5 minutes. Add steeped aromatics to the turkey's cavity along with the rosemary. Tuck the wings underneath the bird and coat the skin liberally with canola oil.

Roast the turkey on lowest level of the oven at 500 degrees F for 30 minutes. Insert a probe thermometer into thickest part of the breast and reduce the oven temperature to 350 degrees F. Set the thermometer alarm (if available) to 151 degrees F. A 14 to 16 pound bird should require a total of 2 to 2 1/2 hours of roasting. Let the turkey rest, loosely covered with foil or a large mixing bowl for 15 minutes before carving.


Another winner recipe was Ali's cranberry salsa. I am a big fan of the cranberry jelly that comes straight out of the can (I know, I know, I got teased miserably for this, but I love it!). This recipe was a close second to the industrial cran-jelly.


Cranberry- Jalapeno Salsa

Ingredients
1 (12-ounce) package fresh or frozen cranberries
1 medium navel orange, unpeeled and coarsely chopped
3 tablespoons crystallized ginger
2 jalapeño peppers, seeded and coarsely chopped
1/4 cup fresh mint leaves
1 cup sugar
Preparation
Pulse cranberries in a food processor until minced. Transfer to a bowl.
Pulse orange and next 4 ingredients in food processor 3 to 5 times or until orange, ginger, and pepper are finely chopped. Stir into cranberries; cover and chill, if desired.


And finally, Ryan's favorite part of the meal...the chocolate pie that Kim made. It was amazing. She found the recipe at Pioneer Woman Cooks, but I doubt that if I had tried to recreate this recipe I could have done it as well as she. She really knocked this one out of the park. You can click on the PW Cooks link above for a full blow-by-blow instructions (with gorgeous photos) or just follow the recipe below.


Delicious! Chocolate Pie
2 sticks regular butter, softened
1 1/2 cups sugar
4 ounces unsweetened chocolate, melted
1 teaspoon vanilla
4 eggs
1 baked pie shell
whipped cream

Beat butter and sugar together until light and fluffy, then mix in cooled melted chocolate. Add vanilla and mix. Turn the mixer to medium speed, then add in the four eggs, one at a time, mixing for 4 to 6 minutes after the addition of each egg. Scrape sides of bowl once during mixing. Pour into the cooled pie shell and refrigerate for at least two hours or overnight. Plop whipped cream on top and serve. Garnish with chocolate curls if you’re feeling sassy.